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Funny Quotes From The King of Queens
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Spence: Ouch!! That has tetnus written all over it!

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Carrie: Excuse me? I'm not gonna throw food at my father.
Doug: What about that chicken leg last week?
Carrie: He threw peas at me first!!

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Doug: You obviously don't understand what's going on here. I'm talking high def...High def.
Carrie: Ohhh, yeah...that means nothing to me.

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Arthur: Ah, you don't know your ass from your elbow

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Doug: My God. How much of that tanning stuff are you using?!
Carrie: None.
Doug: None?! You look like Seal!

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Arthur: In my book, the losers are the real winners.
Doug: Then what are the winners?
Arthur: They're still winners. You can't take that away from them Douglas. After all, they did win.

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Arthur: See, you simply put the Arthur Head screwdriver into the corresponding "A" hole of the screw.

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Doug: By the way, don't bother bringing him (Kirby) by the house this year.
Deacon: Why not?
Doug: Stupid Arthur smashed the pumpkin all over our backyard. Huge mess. Plus the neighorhood cats are taking their sweet ass time licking it up.
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