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Funny Quotes From The King of Queens
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Doug: You see, it's not about me. It's really about what's best for the company, the team. There is no "I" in IPS.

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Doug: Eating is not cheating!

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Arthur: Douglas can you do me a favor and discreatly set the drapes on fire.
Doug: Are things going that bad?
Arthur: Yes. She is diseased and terribly boring!

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Doug: That's offensive. I take my church very seriously.
Arthur: I'm sorry. While you're there, say hi to the Easter bunny for me will ya?

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Woman: What kind of cake is this?
Arthur: It is called fast cake. It tastes better the faster you eat it.

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Arthur: I've got news for you, sweetheart. Tonight was the first night I felt alive since you dragged me into this house. But you couldn't stand to see it, could you? No, you had to hobble me like that fat broad in Misery!

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Doug: How beautiful was that. I hand the girl a strategically folded coupon hiding the expiration date...she hands me a supersize popcorn.
Carrie: Yeah, way to go. You outsmarted a 13-year-old girl with an eyepatch.

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Arthur: But i am basement Artie, i certainly would'nt want to lose that moniker.
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